handiramy's Blog

Just a stupid weblog

Oh my face… :'(

on March 22, 2015

Damn it! What happened with my face?! 😥
Many red spots appeared on my whole cheeks and chin, though they are not obtrusive. Damn it I’m looking hell bad right now… 😥
I have no idea whether they are acne/pimples or it’s because of allergy. Even if it’s because of allergy, what caused it? I’m sure it’s not because of food. I didn’t have any meal since last Friday (well yeah I feel like not eating), I only ate some Oreos and drank strawberry milk. I didn’t go anywhere so it must be not because of air or dust allergy. I guess maybe it’s because of my new face tonic or soap.

Few days ago I made a status on facebook asking if there is anyone has experiences in removing acne scars, because at that time I didn’t have any acne but I got many scars (holes on my skin surface). So some people gave me some advices. Some people suggested me to use “Papaya Soap” from Mustika Ratu, they said it really works. A cousin of mine suggested me to take DIY potato face mask but before doing mask, I must clean my face first, and she suggested me to use Viva milk cleanser and face tonic, not the instant ones such as Oval.

Therefore, last Thursday I went to Hypermart in Bandung Indah Plaza (BIP). I bought the Papaya Soap, Viva milk cleanser and Viva face tonic. But I started using them On Friday. Before I bought them, I have been using Tea Tree Oil from The Body Shop for my acne (got 2 big pimples due to PMS) and my scars as well, and using baby oil from Cussons Baby as face cleanser (my face skin is kinda sensitive so I was always afraid to use any face cleanser), but I have no any skin problem with both of them. So, since last Friday I’ve been using all of them: papaya soap to wash my face, then clean up my face with baby oil, followed by viva, and then apply the Tea Tree Oil as well. Now I don’t know which one which has made my face damaged. I will stop using the papaya soap and Viva from now on to see if my skin will go back to normal again. 😥

If these red spots was because of either papaya soap or viva face cleanser, it means I’m not Indonesian hahaha. Damn it, this is why I never use any Indonesian cosmetic product. Not because I don’t love Indonesia, but my skin just can’t adjust with them! Many people use Indonesian products because the chemicals are not heavy as the imported products (so they think it will be safer for their skin). Other than that, Indonesian products are way cheaper as well. I think my skin type is not so Indonesian since I have Arabian and Dutch blood. Though my face feature is totally Indonesian.

Damn it! I miss the younger version of me 😥
I used to have slim-but-still-curvy body, light skin, and clear face without any scar. But since I broke up with my Pakistani ex boyfriend… Uuufff… Betrayal really collapsed my world! I was too much depressed and I didn’t take care of my skin at all. I got sooo many little acne on my whole face. Guess what I did with those acne? Yep, I squeezed those damn pimples! Every single day! After few months I just realized that it caused holes/scars on my skin. Now I totally regretted it… 😥
WTH all of unfaithful people must go to hell!!! They only create problems to others!!! I’m so damn fed up now! Aaaaarrrggghhh!!!!!

I wish I was rich so that I could visit the best dermatologist in the world, at least in Indonesia! Mom told me to compress my skin with ice blocks. But I have no any ice blocks at hostel and it’s raining so heavily outside there. She also told me not again to try any cosmetic product which I never used before. My silly dad got upset too, geez… Dad, if you really cares about me, send me more money. Beauty takes money! :v hahahaha

My face skin is so bad since last year. It makes me look so old, as if I’m already 33 years old. I used to look younger than my age so many guys were hitting on me, but now I look damn so old and nobody bats their eyes on me. Oh this is so depressing… God, please help me. 😥

When will I have beautiful flawless skin like those Korean actresses? 😥
Damaged skin –>> ugly –>> no guys interested –>> married late
Oh gosh!!! T______T

I know, real men marry you for your personality, not only based on your looks. But men are men. They get attracted to women for the looks in the first place. While women tend to look for men not based on the looks but money, hahahaha. I’m kidding. 😛

Oh God please help me to be slim and beautiful! I want to look beautiful on my graduation day and on my brother’s wedding. Aamiin… :’)


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